welcome, weekend! won’t you stay a while? i feel like i can finally breeeeeathe, and you know what? breathing is underrated. and so are the days on which you have nothing going on after work so that you can do novel things like go to the grocery store at a time other than your lunch hour [only buy what you can stuff in your coworker’s mini fridge! yeah, she loves me] and going for a run [exercise? what’s exercise?].
i’ve been in survival mode lately, trying to keep my head above water with work and the start of culinary school and friends moving away and friends moving here and then of course the “m-word” – you know, starts with “m,” ends with “-en.” yeahhh. that one. have i mentioned lately how hard it is to be a single girl in your twenties? well, lemme tell ya. it is EXHAUSTING. and without guys, i am miss even-tempered, happy-go-lucky, perky as can be, and i don’t really have mood swings, i hate drama, and heck, i rarely even have PMS – i’m like a dude, seriously. in fact, i’d go so far to say that most guys are more moody than i am, in general [irritable man syndrome totally exists, BTW]. but. then you add men into the mix and it’s a game changer. all of a sudden i’m all over the place – i’m up, down, and around with very little control of how my day is going to be because it all depends on what the B-O-Y is doing and how his day is going and how he’s interacting with me and ohhhhh, it just complicates things. and one minute they want to be serious and the next minute they just want to be casual, and i just can’t keep upppp… and guys. i didn’t just fall off the turnip truck [as my grandma would say]. i’m a much smarter and wiser jessica than was the college jessica. i’m done with the games, gentlemen. they may have been cute the first or second time [i’m lying – they were never cute], but the 20th time? not so much. i’m not amused. and yet for some weird reason, i seem to think that i need a human of the male variety for my very own. silly me.
but things do work out the way they’re supposed to, so we’re just keepin’ on keepin’ on. i really thought that God was trying to tell me that i need to give up on all men for a while, but it turns out that he must have other plans, apparently? i’m not certain, but he is making men available. which isn’t always the case with me. so i’m just proceeding cautiously in the man department while meanwhile subtly hinting to God that i want a foolproof man manual for christmas. or maybe a roadmap to my own love life or something. is that too much to ask? also, is it bad to ask God for a christmas present?
{a selfie. because i’m not sure how else to illustrate the above essay.}
in other news…
: : i’m loving this post on a cup of jo. how would YOU describe yourself, right now, in 5 words/phrases? here would be mine: 1.) A&M grad; 2.) foodie; 3.) blogger; 4.) single; 5.) dreamer. it will be so fun to see how those change over the years.
: : these songs have been on repeat over here lately: 1.) birds of tokyo – lanterns – i love this song. 2.) coldplay – a sky full of stars because duh. 3.) shane smith & the saints – dance the night away – the perfect mix of folk, country, rock, and goodness. 4.) mumford & sons – after the storm – the lyrics are tooooooooo good. 5.) daniel and the lion – east – i didn’t know daniel and the lion before, but this is upbeat and has a nice sound to it. 6.) audrey hepburn – moon river – i do love this little lullaby and the clip from breakfast at tiffany’s. even if i think of my dear ol’ dad screeching out the song in his most obnoxious voice. but it’s a sweet one.
: : betcha didn’t know that… more than 100 agricultural crops in the U.S. are pollinated by bees, and one out of three bites of food people eat is thanks to honeybees [source]. pretty interesting, right?
: : i’m already feeling a bit of nostalgia as the summer slips between my fingertips… we still have the warm weather, but i’m about to start my third week of culinary school, and if there’s anything that makes me miss summer… it’s definitely feeling free. no class, no homework, no squeezing in all those errands and engagements for the week into one or two days. i love being able to let my hair air dry – twisted up in a towel until it’s not longer drippy, then woven into a damp braid or rolled up into a soft bun for nighttime or left loose and cool around my neck as i get ready. it is luscious in the hot weather. wearing cool, airy, pretty summer dresses all the time. spending all weekend at the pool. going for a steamy run outside and then taking an icy shower afterward – nothing feels better. when you tilt your head back, the cool water slides slowly down your scalp like ice cubes. the fresh fruit of summer. caprese salad. iced coffee. sangria. sun tea. popsicles. tanned, smooth legs. gahhhh. let me live it a little longer!
: : a quote that i somewhere that has stuck with me: live the life you imagined. i love this.
: : so, dallasites… ever been to dolly python? it is a fabulous “vintage emporium” that i visited for the first time this past weekend. upon which i fell in love and went back promptly a day later to explore even more. turns out, it’s about 4 minutes away from my house, which is a bonus. they have THE BEST selection of cowboy boots + other boots for men and women, and i just about died from all its glory. and then i found the most darling little fringed suede jacket that you ever did see. it’s for a tiny child, my tiny child someday, because… i bought it. which brings me to the next bullet point…
{those boots! [insert smiley with hearts for eyes]}
{that jacket though. i can’t handle the cuteness!}
: : i have a confession. NO, I’M NOT PREGNANT. come on, people! [although i know that i set that up…] but recently, i’ve become interested/fascinated/obsessed with children’s fashion. which is kinda weird considering that i know nothing about children and nothing about fashion. it’s completely out of the blue – i mean seriously, i barely even know anyone with little kids. but my growing awareness of how adorable kids clothes are must have been cultivated by the combo of pinterest and instagram and the multitude of baby showers that i’ve attended at work over the past couple of years, and once it got started, it kept growing. and it’s showing no signs of slowing down. i have this desire to buy clothes for a child that i don’t have [and won’t have for a long time!]. luckily, i’ve managed to suppress this desire for the most part, but i can’t ever be sure that i’m not going to go off the deep end and buy out baby gap or something. i’m not sure what the name of this syndrome or psychological issue is, but it came out of nowhere. and the crazy thing is, i’m completely unashamed. maybe it’s because i’m single as single could be? so i have this notion in my head that i can do whatever the hell i want? because surely if i was actually dating someone, i would calm it down so as not to make it seem like we were ready for THAT. because that is light years away [hate to break it to you, grandmothers]. first comes love, then comes marriage, and then comes… you know the rest. well, i still haven’t hit love yet, so………… anyway, moral of the story: i’m pinning baby clothes on pinterest like it’s my job, and admittedly buying a few gems that were too good to pass up [it was VINTAGE!], so yeah..
{awkward silence}
….that’s all the hap-happenins’ worth talking about around here so enjoy your weekend, folks! ta-ta!
xoxo