yesterday we had a half day of work, and once i got off, i set out to run some errands. i got new running shoes [much needed], picked up some easter goodies, and ran across some herbs at central market…which reminded me how much i’ve been wanting to get a little herb garden set up on my balcony, and it seemed like a great project to start on this half-day friday…so i bought them.
this was a big deal for me, actually, since i’ve never had herbs [although my parents have] and i don’t have the best track record of being a plant mama. [i’ve been known to kill cacti…one even jumped out of its pot which was still standing upright on the table and dove off the balcony and into the parking lot. i still can’t understand how this happened but i was very torn up about the whole thing. am i that bad of a mama?!]
anyway, my little succulents that i’ve had for several months are thriving, and i’ve wanted an herb garden since FOREVER…so i decided to take the plunge and became a proud mother of seven baby herbs: cilantro, italian parsley, onion chives, dill, sweet basil, peppermint, and german thyme [the runt]. i purchased a watering can, a trowel, potting soil, and some planters [$45 for six beautiful ceramic ones at tuesday morning! what a steal!]. i potted them, watered them, and gave them a trim, and then lined them all up in a row for photos! so THIS is what being a mom is like!! i vow to take good care of each of you, little herb babies. hang with me!
and that’s not all! i also adopted a cactus and three more succulents, with hopefully one more baby on the way [to fill an empty pot]. a little overzealous? maybe. but i have faith that my green thumb is growing [no pun intended!]. ;)
it feels good to have something to care for. it also felt great to be working hard yesterday – carrying pots and plants and bags of soil up and down the stairs when you live in an apartment/condo is no small feat! the whole project of buying everything [it wasn’t a one-stop shop for me] to planting took around 6 hours total but i couldn’t think of a better way to spend my good friday.
and i even got to taste the fruits of my labor! fresh herb salad with some peach white balsamic vinegar and persian lime olive oil, anyone? it was so yummy. i’m so excited to start using the fresh herbs to cook and garnish with. they make everything taste better.
i know i’ve been talking a lot about religious-type stuff on here lately, but my faith is a big part of my life, and given that it’s the day before easter, i had one other thought that i wanted to share. as you probably know, many catholics practice fasting on fridays during lent by choosing to abstain from eating meat on these days, hence the fish frys that are popular at catholic churches during lent, especially up in the north. my dad has run our church’s fish fry for many years and i’m so proud of him and all the time and work he dedicates to help out with st. joe’s. [he and my great aunt gerry came up with the breading recipe for the fish years ago and everyone LOVES it – it’s seriously so good!]
because this fish fry is his baby, and because i’ve grown up a practicing catholic, i’m used to abstaining from meat on fridays during lent and have been doing it since i was a kid. i’m not a huge meat eater so it hasn’t really been that hard for me – the hard part is remembering, and if i ever forget, i just don’t worry about it. our family hasn’t really been big on giving something up for lent in the past, even though that’s common among catholic families, and to be honest, i don’t think i’ve ever really understood the concept of fasting for religious reasons. i didn’t really understand the connection.
i’m a person who tends to be against dieting [other than for medical reasons] because i don’t really believe that it works. diets are often not as healthy as they seem, and once you finish dieting, you often go right back to your old ways. i don’t think of it as a sustainable way to be healthy in your life. and i guess i just put fasting in this category – i know there are lots of these “fad fasts” where you cut out certain things, and i guess i’ve never really fully understood all the health benefits. or maybe i just never believe that i could actually do one if i tried[i really don’t think i could, ha!] or could understand why you would want to.
but then i watched this video by matthew kelly, and i have to say that my perspective on fasting changed a little bit. i think the lightbulb finally turned on for me. matthew explains how our ability to deny ourselves is inseparably linked to our ability to succeed at anything. when you think about it, you can’t have a great marriage unless you’re willing to deny yourself. you can’t be a good parent unless you’re willing to deny yourself. you can’t be successful in sports unless you’re willing to deny yourself. you can’t be successful in your career unless you’re willing to deny yourself. you can’t be successful in your personal finances unless you’re willing to deny yourself. you can’t be successful in your health and well-being unless you’re willing to deny yourself. denying yourself is central to both christianity and life and is imperative for succeeding at any of the great many things that god wants us to succeed at. he says that it’s important to look at yourself from time to time and ask, “how good am i at denying myself? how often am i denying myself?” maybe when you’re craving a cookie, and all you want is that cookie…have a glass of water instead. people don’t necessarily see you do this, nobody knows about this internal struggle in your head and your decision to deny yourself, but in that small moment of self-denial, you’re actually taking possession of yourself. we only develop that self-possession through self-denial.
when he said all this, i realized that in some areas of my life, i’m good at denying myself, but in others i’m not. food is one of those areas where i’m not always good at denying myself. i’m pretty decent at denying myself of having MORE of something, if i want to be…but i always want at least one taste, and it’s very difficult for me to deny myself of that one taste. i realized that this is what fasting is all about. it may just be depriving myself of snacking, of that one bite of that something that i really want. when you deny yourself of these things, it’s strange how empowered you feel, like you have control over your thoughts and actions. this is what the lord wants us to feel! he wants us to know that we make choices every day, and those choices affect what type of life we’re leading and how much we’re living out his will. by denying ourselves, we’re reminding ourselves that we have the power to change our lives for the better or for the worse. and most of the time, when we choose not to have that one thing that’s not good for us but that we really want, we’ll realize that this thing may not actually be worth the goodness that we feel by denying ourselves of it, even if it’s just for that one day.
after a small-ish lunch at the office yesterday, i decided that i was going to fast for the rest of the day. a half day of fasting doesn’t sound like a big deal, but it is for me. you have to know, guys – i’m such a snacker! i had a piece of toast for dinner and my tiny fresh herb salad and some hot vanilla tea, and that was it for the twelve hours that i was awake after lunch. [some of you might be laughing because you skip meals all the time, no problem. but THIS GIRL DOESN’T SKIP MEALS. haha. i’m pretty much eating all the time.] it wasn’t as hard as i was thinking it would be, mostly because i was keeping busy… but i will admit that right before i went to bed, the hunger pains were jabbing at me! but this is absolutely nothing compared with what jesus had to go through to wash away our sins forever. in my human weakness, i still think that days of fasting would be really difficult for me. but i want to try to focus more on fasting next year during lent on all fridays [not just good fridays], and maybe other times too, when i think i could use a reminder on denying myself. baby steps!
i hope you all have a very happy easter, and remember the reason why we celebrate! xoxo